 |
| https://www.googleplaymusicdesktopplayer.com/img/par1.jpg |
So this is one of the songs I've wanted to write. It's the first draft that I've shown anybody and as of now its just lyrics. I do have an idea of how I want to sing it but no music or anything like that. On that note, if anyone knows a good music maker app that's free please tell me in the comments. Also, I want your feedback so if you think it's bad to tell me why. If you think its good but think it needs something tell me. I welcome all feedback because that's the point of showing people a draft.
I fell for you the moment I saw your eyes.
I couldn’t breathe I was paralyzed.
I didn’t know what to say but I knew that I couldn’t do nothing.
I wanted to get closer to you, so I decided to take a leap of faith; ask you your name, ask for your number and hope for the best….
I’m begging for things to be all right, I’m hoping to get through the way I’m feeling for you. And I’m praying for a time when you could be mine.
…. I took my shot shot shot in the dark, hoping everything wouldn't break apart. Cause I’m aiming straight for your heart and I hope I don’t miss because I don’t know what I’d do if I couldn’t see you.
Baby I know you won’t believe me when I say let me make, a shot in the dark.
Baby I don’t know what I’m feeling when I watch you walk away but if I let you go all regret it every single day... So turn around I’m begging you. Just give me a shot and all come through. I don't know if what I’m feeling is love but it’s not something I’m going to let go of.
I”ll take my shot shot shot in the dark hoping everything doesn’t fall apart. Cause I’m aiming straight for your heart. And I’m praying, and begging that I hit my mark. Cause I don’t know what I'd do if I… I don’t know what you’d do…. I fell for you and I’m still falling …. And I'm gonna take my, take my, gonna take my shot shot shot in the dark. Hope I don’t miss your heart; hope I leave a mark.
Cause I'm afraid of what I'd feel inside if I had to watch you walk away. Now it’s too late, the shots been fired, shots been fired now, shots been fired. Shots been fired away.
Oh. My. Gosh. I can't believe you really wrote that. I love, love, love those lyrics and would love to read any others you've written! Let me know when you have the song finished cause I would love to listen!
ReplyDeleteIt is really nice to see that you are comfortable enough with your English class that you would share this with us. I think this is very good for a first draft. I know that you can't give set the rhythm over a blog post, but I am sure that it would sound even better when set to an appropriate rhythm and sound track. Keep working on it!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for the positive feedback!!!!!
ReplyDeleteNice!!! This sort of reminds me of "Heaven Must Of Sent You" By the Elgins, but I personally love Bonnie Pointer's non-disco version. Back on topic, really great lyrics, not to difficult to understand, great strategy used to convey your message. For a second, I thought you made a music video and wanted us to hear your awesome voice, but I'll be waiting for that day soon. I don't know any free music maker app, but there may be one. Other than that, great stuff.
ReplyDeleteI agree with everybody else that has commented on this! I love how open you are and that you can let your emotions shine through in this form. I love how the lyrics tell a story and evoke emotion which is exactly what they should do. Good job!!
ReplyDeleteI really liked the lyrics and the little story it told. I also tried to come up with a rhythm in my head, but I couldn't get it all. I can't wait to hear it from you. Making music is something I've been learning about and working on for a while now, and about a year ago I downloaded FL Studio. It's a music program, and it's quite expensive, but I like it and understand the language of it. I'm not sure if there are very many decent free beat-makers, but if you'd like something similar to a rough draft with any instrument I'd be happy to try and help. Let me know if you're interested :D
ReplyDeleteThis is such a great resource that you are providing and you give it away for free. I love seeing blog that understand the value of providing a quality resource for free. hydra onion
ReplyDeleteI was surfing the Internet for information and came across your blog. I am impressed by the information you have on this blog. It shows how well you understand this subject. tor hydra
ReplyDelete